Starting Fresh

Not to dwell on subject matters again but the "you left my clean dry clothes on the liner"  thing happen AGAIN this morning!

As usual I AM the one who's nagging at 7am, but well he chooses to do it at 7am, so ..huh?!

This time, the excuses was - I haven't even finish starting out what i'm doing yet i have to eat my breakfast and prepare for work!! 

- If that's so, then why even bother to do the clothes? Can't it wait til tonight?

I wasn't even worked up this time - again "It's the thought that counts", i have two hands and two legs, although i got a cold but i'm pretty damn sure i'm capable of getting my dry clean clothes off the liner and put them back in my drawer. 

Anyhow, right after he finish breakfast, he got on and took mine off the liner in a 悔氣 kinda of manner. He just doesn't get it, does he?

I just thank him and get on with my routine for work. 

I sound pretty pathetic, don't i? I just can't help thinking that this is the end of this relationship. He rationalized all my "nice gesture" & "caring" into "this is just normal"

Ok i admit, i have attitudes and maybe lots of them but we just can't seem to be in the same room peacefully anymore. It's too much for him & too much for me.

Today, all i felt was that "I WANNA BE FUCKIN SINGLE!"

And for that, i'll be giving up cheap rent and vacations, yet the voice in my head tells me that it's the right thing to do.

2013 - new year, fresh start. Done deal.

ATTACK!!

Went to Body Attack class in GMP this morning...
Waaaaa...still hard as i remember, so many moves haahah...still mixed up all the coordination. Looks really silly when every else is doing "left leg, right arm" and i'm "left leg, whaaaaaattt arm?!" lol

But Keroro said i'm much better than last time!! At least i don't look like i'm dying!!! *Woohoo*

I think i'll go to more attack class if i'm not doing bootcamp, i especially like the jump lunges - i obviously can't do it continuously like Pam does but I can really feel the pain afterwards, so it must be good for the legs, i need my love handles and my inner thigh fat to GO AWAY!!

BURN BURN BURN!!!

LMFAO

I watched LMFAO concert last night (with Redfoo - the guy with a massive afro ) and I LOOOOOOOOOVE IT!!!

I dance, dance, dance, dance and dance cos everyone is doing it and it was soo dark - wakaka...no one would have notice that i dance like a frog LOL

Their music is highly recommended - their MV & live performance is superbly entertaining!! Good laugh, good fun!

Monday

Went to my first BC after a long time, I genuinely cannot remember the last time I BC during the weekdays.

Last night it was T5 -3 = big guy & me

It was great to see him cos big guy has almost completely disappear from the face of the earth for the last few months, it's good to see him despite that it was probably one of the worse day in his career life. 

I can absolutely relate to him and these things happen all the time at work. Even without having worked with him nor knowing what he actually do, i still have no doubt that he is more than competent in doing what he does, you can just tell by their personality & attributes. So knowing the potential of what you can become (regardless whether you'd like to or not) but being denied that opportunity is really hard to make peace with. It reminds me of a Chinese proverb- 懷才不遇.

As a friend, the only thing we can do is to trying cheering him up as best as we can but this is something that only he can overcome in time. 

I seriously think that in his situation, none of his competence as leader was in question, it's purely bureaucratic. Promotion means paperwork & justification. Less justification, less chance to being questioned and bombarded. That's how the system works. Not that i agree with it but once you're in the system, there seem to be no way around it. It all comes down to whether you're boss is a person with conscience and whether he/she is willing to fight for your greater good. 

Big guy if you're reading this ----- We are fighters and we never give up!!

I have so many thoughts in my head these days, which i don't even know what to write!

I am starting to get a little worry about the Unicef half marathon to be very honest, I know i can finish it, it's just a matter of time and how badly beaten i'll be the day after. 

Tai Hau seems to be ultra confident about doing his Angkor Wat half marathon in a reasonably good time....Aii...sometime i really envy him who has the capacity to improve fast and strong. 

I've been to bootcamp 6-7 months now. Whilst i do not deny that I've made progress but just a lot slower than anybody else, people who's join for 3 months have already outgrown me >.< I feel a bit useless sometimes even though knowing that i'm doing the best i can. 

Whilst being envious is not really productive, i guess it's up to me to just work as hard as i could and not having to be injured every now and then...



Mmm...i have a fudden crave of awlfully choco cake...Arrrggghghgh!!

Lunch Entertainment

As if regular burpees isn't hard enough...-.- 

Day 3

I never really knew how I get by my first 2x years of living without regular exercise. It's been the 3rd day I haven't even drop a sweat and it's mentally irritating, I felt like my whole body became soft, all muscles turned into fat....well i probably deserved it cos i could've done some core exercise at home but am just too lazy XD

Another BIG dinner tonight :D very looking forward!

I tell myself that i'll work extra and go running every night starting next week, even on bootcamp days...but only if my leg is feeling less painful.

Was talking to a colleague yesterday about injuries in general, she scared the shit out of me with her story.

She said a friend of hers got injured while playing tennis, probably tore the muscle on the (left or right) thigh, and it hurts even when he walks. He thought give it sometime and it'll get better eventually, and of course like us hardcore ppl, he kept going hiking and even went on a holiday in Phuket with his gf walking along the beach. At one point, it was soo painful that he couldn't walk anymore and had to stop while walking on the beach.

Since it doesn't really look like a normal injury, a month later, he went to see a doctor. Doctor gave him inflammatory medication but still, it seems that it's not getting any better. He went on and see a few others but conditions remains the same. And finally he went to see a bone specialist and it turns out that his ligament was torn!! The doctor believed that the wound started out only to be a few centimeters but by the time he was in the specialist, it expands to over 10 centimeters already (well at least now we know why it's so painful!!)

Story doesn't end here but to cut it short - he went under the knife and repair the ligament but the wound is not healing and starting to get puss around the incisions, at the very end, he had to switch doctor, from a bone specialist to a plastic surgeon(?! why plastic surgeon i have no clue). and the surgeon had to un-stitch the wound, attached it with a machine that is specially use for sanitizing internal wounds, wait until the inflammation goes down and then had to cut a piece of his flesh on the other thigh to cover up the wound that was not able to heal properly.

This whole drama lasted for half a year, simply because he thought it was nothing but a sore muscle at the first place.

Scared the shit out of me, so now i'm staying put until the pain on my thigh is gone! 

好想

好想 好想

好想 好想.....ooOooo...
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好想打邊邊呵....lol 

Been thinking about this since 6pm last night!